My Life As A Dad...

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Hey, I'm back!

OK, so life has changed. Since I last wrote it's been, uh... over 2 years. OVER 2 YEARS?!

0.o

I have this to say right off the bat: divorce sucks. I mean it is the worst thing that I can imagine a person ever having to go through. I say that of course, because I am in the midst of it though near the tail end (I hope) and I went through my own parents divorcing when I was 8. I was decimated at first, but now I am back and inspired and ready to go!

I am reading a book about writing that says all I have to do in order to be successful at writing, or at anything, is to show up fully (body, mind, heart, desire and soul). And I knew, as soon as I read that I knew from my heart of hearts and my soul of souls that this is true. It's that simple! I just need to do this. I can do this! I will do this!!

OK. Here I am, all of me. Let's get started... uh, hey mind now stop worrying about what people are going to say and how they will react to what I say. Be yourself, stay inspired and avoid this self doubt. Good. Oh, and body, I know you want to either eat ice cream or get up and climb something, but please, let's work together here. Settle down for a bit. OK, let's go... oh now this is embarrassing. Hey desire, can we think about winning the lottery or dating Angelina Jolie later? Thanks. OK, ready to go now... oh geezus! Heart, now come one. I know you've been through hell lately but you are OK now, you really are OOOO Kaaaay. Crap, now I'm crying. Breathe, breathe, breathe...

Here I am, all of me; all the mess and the triumph and the failure and the doubt and the emotional devastation and the newly improved self confidence and the madness and the joy and the hurt and the loving nature and the terrified, wounded, bitter part. It's all here, now. I just show up with all this, and I can do this, I can write something inspiring and I can succeed at being alive, fully alive being who I truly am when all these parts of myself are here and working together.

Shit.

Come on all of me, let's go get some ice cream...
(to be continued soon with major breakthroughs and more insites...)

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